Domestic abuse can significantly effect the lives of children, both now and later in life. Some of these effects include: Increased risk of child abuse. In homes where there is spousal violence, the likelihood of child abuse is 15 times higher. Seventy-five percent of men who abuse their spouses go on to abuse the children as well. Women are eight times more likely to hurt their children when they are being abused than when they are safe. Increased risk of violent and abusive behaviors. Adolescent males who see abuse in the home are ten times more likely to abuse their future spouse than those raised in a non-violent home. Girls who see abuse in the home are more likely to become involved in abusive relationships than those who don't are. Seventy-five percent of violent children come from homes with domestic violence. Emotional Trauma Children may feel: Guilty about the abuse and for not stopping it Abuse is their fault Excessive grief for family problems/loss and for personal loss Confused about conflicting feelings toward the parents: love, hate, fear Fear of abandonment, the unknown, and personal injury Anger about the violence and the chaos in their lives Depressed Helpless Powerless Embarrassed about events and dynamics at home. Behavioral problems (often seen in opposite extremes) Act out/withdraw Overachieve/underachieve Needy/overly independent Low self-esteem/overbearing Passive/aggressive Refuse to go to school Other behavioral problems: Become caretakers for younger siblings and for parent(s) Act aloof, sarcastic, defensive Wet bed Frequent nightmares Trouble setting own limits and/or following directions May scream excessively when infants Social Difficulties Isolated from friends and relatives Relationships are frequently stormy, start intensely and end abruptly Difficulty in trusting, especially adults Poor conflict resolution and anger management skills Excessive social involvement (avoid home life) May be overly passive with peers, or bully peers Engage in exploitive relationships either as perpetrator or victim Play with peers gets exceedingly rough. Physical Problems Somatic complaints (headaches, stomachaches) Stuttering Nervous, anxious and a short attention span Tired, lethargic Frequently ill Poor personal hygiene Regress to previous developmental stages such as: bedwetting, thumb sucking Desensitization to pain High-risk play and activities Self abuse YOUR CHILDREN DEPEND ON YOU FOR SAFETY AND SECURITY. IF YOU ARE A VICTIM OF DOMESTIC VIOLENCE AND HAVE CHILDREN AT HOME, PLEASE KNOW THAT HELP IS AVAILABLE